Date Night

I happen to have a date tonight and for the life of me, i just cant get myself in the right mindset for it.

Ive been single for almost a year and its been almost 10 months since i went on an actual date and now i just feel so mentally drained processing having to do this again

the last date i went on was so effortless, probably because i was in a relationship with the guy and more importantly we clicked on so many levels

and now, i just have no interest in getting to know someone new. i am just in that mental space thats more of me myself and i.

i got up and i had to just think, why?

why did i agree to this? i had said no so many times, maybe the guy wore me down

or am i trying not to keep myself in a  bubble or detached from the outside world

being an introvert and having to attend social gatherings is hard enough but one on one dates? you cant fake dance your way through those

but what if this date actually turns out great?

ive been sitting in my bed all day and i cant even get myself to start getting ready or pick an outfit.

you know, the little excitement that comes with having to go out.

i really dont know how this will go honestly. i dont even know if i should show up or cancel last minute. im just so mentally exhausted

too mentally exhausted at the moment.

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