What i wish i knew 5 years ago

My best friend just told me she’s now in a relationship with a guy she had been crushing on for a while. I got so excited and just started pouring out information, all I’ve learnt in love so far.

If theres one very valuable lesson I’ve learnt about relationships based on my own experiences, its that things work best when you are both willing to learn, as to when you think you know it all. Willingness to learn is the key ingredient because you soon realise that both of you are very different and if You don’t learn communication you will be stuck in your version of the fact,when in reality there are two versions to the fact.

Its a lesson i learnt the hard way and with so much resistance to the idea for so long. I should have accepted it earlier and alot would have been easier.

As long as you are both willing to learn from each other, only then will you make any relationship work.

He’s a differnt universe , you are another.. you have to learn one another to fully enjoy all that companionship has to offer. Even when the circumstances seem horrible always try to understand and learn from the situation. Like why is my loved one acting this way and when you talk to him he should be willing to listen.

If you both are willing to learn from each other then you are in for a lifetime of fun coz from there you will learn how to communicate, how to understand, how to handle each other and above all how to love and be loved.

Sometimes you think you know yourself until someone teaches you something about yourself you were oblivious to. Especially how you want to be loved.

So always be willing to learn. If you feel you know it all in love or you’ve seen it all just leave that mindset behind because your head will spin, your earth will crash when life shows you that infact you don’t know as much as you thought.

Actually this advice works for many aspects of life but for now its towards loooovvveeee.

And its very important to notice if he is willing to learn from you and learn how to love you. Like when you tell him you like something or don’t like something does he take it into consideration? When you are sad and down, does he actively learn how to handle the sutures with your guidance? Does he actually make efforts to listen to your opinions towards matters? Listening and Learning work hand in hand. You have to listen to get what you need to learn from the other person. And vise-versa.

Believe me how willing he is to learn is the best indication of a situation to stay in or to leave behind. If he can learn then any problem you encounter can be fixed, its all about guidance but if he can’t, you will be a broken tape recorder always talking about the same things over and over. Same applies for you. When he talks, listen. When he doesnt like or like something, pay attention. Its all about both parties choosing to make an effort at all times.

And always remember to reflect on how you are growing as a person. Never ever ever twist your life around his.

Have things you like to do alone or with friends without him. Yes, spend loads of time on activities es together and plans that fit both schedules but aside from that, have tike for yourself and friends.

Self love should continue to grow even inside the relationship. Don’t lose yourself and intertwine yourself completely. Remember it’s two individuals making a couple not two half people merging to make a blob

Remember everyone is difficult in someway or the other its all about who is worth it and that is entirely up to you to access. Finally, Appreciate one anothers differences and compliment each other every chance you get. He is your partner now. You are both routing for each other. His wins are yours and yours his.

Protect your energy

Can’t be wasting energy on everyone and everything

Good luck 😉


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